Couple conundrums

Kumbaya

One of my earliest ‘serious’ relationships (I was 18 and it was for 3 months, it _felt_ serious okay?!) was with, let’s call him Jeremy.

Jeremy was adorable, he had a bit of an accent, shiny dark hair and wasn’t too tall so I didn’t get a crick in my neck if we kissed standing up (oh the simplicity of being a teenager).

Now, Jeremy was a virgin. And Jeremy had decided he would quite like to lose his virginity to me. So understandably I was quite flattered, slightly nervous seeing as I hadn’t had much experience myself and from memory I was already phrasing ways to say how good he was even if it only lasted 30 seconds to save him any embarrassment. You know, I wanted his first time to be special.

If only I had known.

Four Faintly Funny Stories

Four short stories that at times read like fiction, but I can honestly (and somewhat unfortunately) say, they are truth!

The funny: Say my name, bitch!

I tried internet dating a couple of times. Had a couple of pleasant dates, some lecherous dates, went out a couple of times with one guy and then there was ‘Nick’.

Nick and I met on NZ Dating, he lived in Auckland and I lived in Hamilton. We dated for about 3 months. It was never very serious and simply ran its course, but that’s not the funny story here.